Building Community: Tap Into Your Village
Since I was beginning a PhD program, my immediate community that I wanted to establish was with those going through a similar process. After speaking to my advisor, I began to reach out via LinkedIn & my departments website to other incoming and current students. I also used my network that I had established in Michigan to connect with other people that some of my mentors thought might be beneficial. I also made sure to reach out to faculty members both inside and outside my department. My reasoning behind this was because I was curious about some of the research that some other faculty were engaging in as well. I would also go to different social events that I would find via Instagram, Eventbrite, or Twitter. It was here that I was able to connect with other transplants or people from the local community and meet people just walking around, and I would also learn about local community organizations as well.
You vs. You: Being Your Biggest Supporter
I say this all the time, but I truly believe that you can only go as far as you believe that you can go. It starts with self, and you have to believe before anyone else can. If you are constantly telling yourself what you cannot do, then you limit the possibilities of what can happen. In the academy, imposter syndrome can be a real challenge that causes students to feel as though they do not belong and that you must overcompensate. For me, I have not really dealt with this too much because I believe that God has placed me exactly where I need to be and hold tightly to this message when feelings of doubt can arise. I also practice daily journaling, which is helpful whether you’re moving for school, work, or any other reason. Being able to daily remind yourself of your strengths, things you learned, and how you can apply it moving forward to play tremendous dividends in being intentional with your own self-growth. Your brain is a muscle, and the more you fill yourself up with positive affirmations, supportive community, and other healthy outlets, the stronger and brighter your outlook will become. This is crucial, especially as there will be inevitable and unexpected situations that can occur.
Shoot Your Shot:
You miss 100% of the shots that you do not take! This applies across the board, and I made sure to reach out to all different types of people when I moved to LA. My reasoning behind this was because I wanted to make sure I was not limiting my experiences. Shooting your shot to me could appear in the forms of emailing that professor whose article I enjoyed, applying for that photo shoot, reviewing different fellowships, reaching out to people, and exploring new places amongst many other things! If you do not hear back when you reach out from people, no worries, keep shooting your shot & keep reaching out! There are many reasons why people may not respond, but it is not up to you to go through that non-exhaustive list of possibilities. I’m a true believer of everything happens for a reason, and I use this point across every area of my life.
Give Yourself Some Grace:
Do not undervalue the move, as it is a full-time transition. Although you may have a robust plan and lengthy list of goals like I had when I moved to LA, know that things can change. One of the biggest constants is that nothing is constant, and the only thing that is consistent is change. With this is important to be able to adapt to new situations and also not be too hard on yourself if everything is not going according to plan. In those frustrating moments, remind yourself how far you have come and where you plan on heading!! The present is a gift and the future is only brighter.
Being Consistent:
There is something powerful about beginning a routine, whether it be daily prayer or daily journaling. For me, things that anchor me are prayer, running, and dancing on a consistent basis. These are habits that I took with me from Michigan & which have played a significant role in a sense of structure within my transition. Being consistent with myself even builds self-confidence, because I know that I will deliver what I said to myself. This empowers and affirms myself which allows me to move and do the same for others. You can only give out what you put in, so it is important to make sure you are investing things such as love, grace, and peace within yourself so that it exudes from your aura onto others.
Feelings Come & Go:
One of the most important lessons that I have learned in my year on the other side of the country are that feelings are temporary. While this does not mean that you ignore your feelings, as I believe acknowledgement is the first step to finding a solution, you should not harp on them too much. If the same feeling continues to arise, I would recommend making sure you make space to really dig into the potential reasoning behind this, talk to your village, and seek therapy and other mental health resources if need be. There is nothing wrong with seeking help, and I am glad to see the stigma behind this beginning to fade, especially for people of color. As you navigate a myriad of feelings though, remind yourself of the reasoning behind your move and stick to those same or evolving points to help get you through certain experiences that may evoke certain feelings.
While there are so many other important lessons that I have learned within my first year here in LA, these are a few that have played a significant role and points that I plan to use and build upon to have an even better second year! Whether you are preparing for your first year in your PhD program or making a that move to a new city or state, feel free to reach out! It takes a village!
We're so proud of you taking this journey and the adventurous way in which you did it, via vehicle and embarking upon your new beginning in LA! You must know that I was praying for you ALL the way!!